I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
