on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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