I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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