Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Randomize
