He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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