Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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