4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
