Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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