just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
