i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
