i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
