it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
