So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
