idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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