Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
