u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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