We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
