Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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