David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
