forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Your shirt... Was in my pants
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