Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
this beer tastes like vomit already
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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