I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
