so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
