Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Operation Purity has been aborted
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
This toilet bowl is my home.
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