Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Randomize
