told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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