New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize
