I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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