Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
