I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
