idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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