I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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