Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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