A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
