i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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