i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
