There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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