i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
