he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
