Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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