Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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