Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
