These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
