Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
