A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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