Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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