by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
