I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
