Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize