This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
